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Mangaluru: Rejected by children, Subbalaxmi's hope hinges on senior citizen's helpline

  •   Mon, Dec 06 2021 05:12:40 PM

Daijiworld Media Network - Mangaluru (SP)

Mangaluru, Dec 6: This 85-year-old woman has nine children. But none of them is prepared to take care of her. Seeking help to live in the company of her children, she has knocked at the doors of the senior citizens helpline located in Pandeshwar police station.

Subbalaxmi (85) had five daughters and five sons but one of her sons is no more. The lady's desire is to stay with the families of her children by rotation for a month each. She was with her son at Thokkottu Kapikad, but she was sent away to the residence of a distant relative three months back. Subbalaxmi feels very much hurt by the fact that no one has come to pick her thereafter.

Subbalaxmi cannot convince herself to go to her daughters and stay with them as she believes that the sons have the responsibility of taking care of their mother. She has been waiting with bated breath for the arrival of her sons to take her away to their homes. But none of them are available for contact. Subbalaxmi feels left high and dry as she has not been able to get a shelter even though she has nine children. Having been hurt and humiliated, she has approached the senior citizens helpline for justice.

Police inspector of the station, Revathi, contacted Subbalaxmi's sons with the help of helpline coordinators and gave them two weeks time. However, they did not come forward to take away their mother. On December 4 , along with the helpline coordinator, S Revathi, and counsellors Mahima, Ranjini, Usha and Ashita, Subbalaxmi was escorted to the house of her son along with the police near Thokkottu Kapikad but the house was found locked.

The officials said that when they called the house of the lady's son, the daughter-in-law who responded to the call, berated the police and helpline staff with abusive words. Subbalaxmi was brought back. It has been decided to ask the lady's four sons to come to the police station for discussions on the lady's future. If the sons fail to take her, the officials said, they will register case as per law and then get the case heard at the court of the sub-divisional officer.

 

 

 

 
  

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Comment on this article

  • Jayu, Mumbai

    Thu, Dec 09 2021

    What a faith luk at the boys ....humanity dosent exist this days seriously .....the day should come so bad tht even their children should behave the same way they did to amma ...and eventually no where it's written girls can't take care even girls have equal rights to take care of parents ....all this people if they have little bit ofshame then they still hv time to improve

    DisAgree Agree Reply Report Abuse

  • Manu, Bangalore

    Tue, Dec 07 2021

    You reap what you sow. This is very relevant for this old woman & biased laws in democratic countries. Enjoy democracy!

    DisAgree Agree [3] Reply Report Abuse

  • Don, Mangalore

    Tue, Dec 07 2021

    The government of India should enact and enforce rules similar to those in Western countries to become a welfare state. Each child MUST come up with a fixed amount of money to pay for their mom's upkeep. Parents must look after their children till the age of 18, and children MUST take care of their parents in their old age. If they don't they government should garnish their wages/income and put a lien on their homes and properties to recover the money spent on the parent on behalf of the children.

    DisAgree [2] Agree [8] Reply Report Abuse

  • Cynthia, Dk

    Tue, Dec 07 2021

    Yes....beautiful suggestions...valid points....🙏🙏

    DisAgree Agree [7] Reply Report Abuse

  • Rita, Germany

    Tue, Dec 07 2021

    As we see the lady in this picture ,we shouldnt underestimate her .she looks very fit to her age ,and define others must be.as she already told ,it is sons duty to lookafter her ,other children too must be not willing to take her in their house.One should cooperate with rest of the people not dictate one when she wants to live her olden days.Two sides of a coin should be checkeed.

    DisAgree [5] Agree [8] Reply Report Abuse

  • Sandy, Udupi

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Moral of the story : Have only one or two children. NOT 10!!

    DisAgree [27] Agree [15] Reply Report Abuse

  • Rochester, Mangalore

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    We need to know both side story. All nine children wouldn't throw her out just like that. All mothers in law create lots of trouble for young daughter in law and make life miserable sadly. Please check both side story.

    DisAgree [17] Agree [40] Reply Report Abuse

  • Ayub malpe, Mangalore

    Tue, Dec 07 2021

    When you were in mothers womb , how much trouble you gave her, when you were kid you didn't trouble her, and you were sick , how many nights she didn't sleep..?! At those time she should have given to orphanage. Never express annoyance even if she is doing something annoying.--quran.

    DisAgree [3] Agree [13] Reply Report Abuse

  • KS Mayya, Mangalore/Bangalore

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Sadly, with more and more emphasis on personal growth, cultural values are on decline. It is a harsh reality that the young (before going to school) and the old are the most vulnerable part of our society. Both these categories although have law on their side, they for some reason cannot represent themselves. They need support to even exercise their right. We need adequate machinery purely working on their interest including formation of a separate ministry to take care of their interests. Example1: If somebody in society rescues a kid from a abusing parent or guardian, what will he do next unless he can take the responsibility. We do not have supporting mechanism. We know how abusive Orphanage is. Example2: If a old woman is feeling alone and kind of feeling abused or has been completely abandoned by Children, where should she go? Who will provide assistance? We equally are aware of how disgraceful it is for old people to finally live in old age home while he/she has kids who are doing well but see her/him as perfect burden meant for old age home or Vruddhashrama?

    DisAgree [5] Agree [21] Reply Report Abuse

  • Langoolacharya., Belman / Washington, DC.

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    People, Those who ill treat their own parents....Shame on them ... mark my words....your own Children will 'ill treat' you when you become old... ...Tak...Takk...

    DisAgree [6] Agree [33] Reply Report Abuse

  • mohan prabhu, mangalore/canada

    Tue, Dec 07 2021

    dovorlen pampalhen.

    DisAgree [1] Agree [1] Reply Report Abuse

  • CHRISTINE, mangalore

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Mother in law will rule daughter in laws at the beginning of the marriage. She will not allow daughter in law to have peaceful and loving life with her own son. This is all girls life. Now she became old and need somebody.. Wounds she created with daughter in law will not allow them to love her and look after her at this age. If mother in laws poke their nose in sons married life this the consequence they had to bear.

    DisAgree [22] Agree [38] Reply Report Abuse

  • KS Mayya, Mangalore/Bangalore

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Are you one of those unfortunate daughter in law of Subbalaxmi or should I assume that stereotyping is full fledged and complete with your comment? What a shame...

    DisAgree [14] Agree [30] Reply Report Abuse

  • Logical Mangalorean, MaNgalore

    Fri, Dec 10 2021

    Well said.. Nobody sees the other side of the story. At this age the lady has gone to the police station. No wonders one can guess the amt of torture given to daughters in law a few yrs back. To get love and care one should give love and care. Its mutual in any relationship

    DisAgree Agree Reply Report Abuse

  • Agnes, Mangalore

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Need to check both sides of the coin. Deep rooted issues surround such situatons.

    DisAgree [3] Agree [46] Reply Report Abuse

  • Vidisha, Mumbai

    Tue, Dec 07 2021

    What ever the case may be, her children cannot leave their mother at the mercy of others.

    DisAgree [2] Agree [5] Reply Report Abuse

  • Rakesh Nayak, Mumbai/Mangalore

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    One thing has to be remembered, one should not depends on their children at the old age. There shall he some plan for old age to make it secured & liveable without any dependencies on others. Similarly children should not claim for entitlement from their parents as soon they reach adulthood. Every one got one life to live . No one shall claims entitlement from either side. Moreover as it in the other countries, there suppose to be support system in our society to address social security issues. But that seems to he distant dreams. The people we elect are not well read and has no idea about social science, whatsoever!

    DisAgree [5] Agree [48] Reply Report Abuse

  • Noel, Udupi

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Exactly

    DisAgree [2] Agree [17] Reply Report Abuse

  • Gibbs, Udupi

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    How can her Nine Children abandon her... someone should have look after her or at least arranged her old age home for her.

    DisAgree [1] Agree [33] Reply Report Abuse

  • Rita, Germany

    Tue, Dec 07 2021

    Gbbs Udipi,we cant question how and why.we dont know the situation of these children ,in what condition they live.Of course every mother expects ,but each child expects that why not the other but me?So continues sometimes.Her husband (Lost)?should have made arrangements earlier.When children dont want their mother or in law with them ,then no use of staying there only to hear abuse and problems.Best is let each of her children pay a certain amount of money eac month , and let the mother stay in a peaceful home ,her own life ,without cry and abuses.sad it came so but better so.let each child visit her when they want or she can visit them if she can.Peace for everyone.Not all daughters or their partners ,daughter in laws are in a understanding phase.Ifsomeone wanted to take the old lady to them have done aalready ,so here message is clear,noone wants her.Very sad I find..May God help her.

    DisAgree [2] Agree [2] Reply Report Abuse

  • Observer, Mangaluru

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    I can see bitter truth here that for some people, so called 'Gomatha' a cow which is an animal they use for worship is superior than a human Biological Matha.

    DisAgree [3] Agree [50] Reply Report Abuse

  • Vivek, Karkala/Mangalore

    Wed, Dec 08 2021

    Wrong to bring up religious practices in this situation. There is no link here. This situation may arise in any community irrespective of belief system. I can bring up examples if you want. There may be reasons why all the children are refusing. Or else at least few of them would have done something. I think we all have someone in family who can not be repaired or don't fit.

    DisAgree Agree [1] Reply Report Abuse

  • Dr.S.Kamath, Mumbai

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Problem:At old age children are not looking after their parents Solution1.Teach your children morality right from.childhood they will look after you 2.When young buy/invest in a pension fund then you will be like an ATM for them they will look after you well because you are getting good money every month 3.Be in the company of influential people of community then children will have fear atleast for reputation 4.Keep am habit of socializing so that you have lot of freinds

    DisAgree [7] Agree [41] Reply Report Abuse

  • Vinaya, Mangalore

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    I fully agree with the comments. To add something to it for young parents, keep some savings everymonth for you, so that it will help you in your old age.

    DisAgree Agree [4] Reply Report Abuse

  • G R PRABHUJI, Mangalore

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    If any donars keep Rs 2cr in her name, see the change, all will rush to that lady to take care and again fighting will start in between them to take her home. Everything money money money.

    DisAgree [3] Agree [56] Reply Report Abuse

  • pili, Mangalore

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    so many groups for govirakshak.. no group for marakashak?

    DisAgree [5] Agree [57] Reply Report Abuse

  • k b r, Mangala Uru

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    one of those gorakshak organisations, kindly treat her at least as an old deserted cow and arrange proper food and shelter...pls....

    DisAgree [5] Agree [51] Reply Report Abuse

  • praana, ksa

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    may almighty protect all our mothers from these kind of children..

    DisAgree [5] Agree [30] Reply Report Abuse

  • Naveen Frank, Sharjah, UAE

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Even if the law forces the children to accept their mother into their homes, the life of this poor old lady will be miserable. She will definitely be ill-treated by her own children and their households. It is best the mother spends the evening of her life in a Charitable Old age home where she will be treated with respect and dignity.

    DisAgree [2] Agree [40] Reply Report Abuse

  • Gibba, Udupi

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Children of this old lady forgetting that they too one day will become old and helpless and their children too will take note of lesson they have learnt from parents.

    DisAgree [5] Agree [28] Reply Report Abuse

  • Elwyn Goveas, Mangalore

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Once upon a time did the best of best to her children ,gave them education ,moral support .spiritual knowledge,delicious food and what not in this earth ,now it is the duty of their children to look after her and make her happy.Thats why this nature showing his anger on mankind in the form of disaster and so on.

    DisAgree [3] Agree [21] Reply Report Abuse

  • Moshu, Mangaluru

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Its heart wrenching. Fake nationalists can't mislead people of India by blaming a section of community for population growth.

    DisAgree [5] Agree [17] Reply Report Abuse

  • Jossey Saldanha, Raheja Waterfront

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    How can these people abandon a Senior Citizen ...

    DisAgree [9] Agree [24] Reply Report Abuse

  • Nisha, mangalore

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    Its very sad at old age own children not ready to take care of their own parents...why not daughters not coming forward even she is mother to those why only sons, even police question daughters too.... When equal law for both son n daughter this is also equal responsibility.... Daughters also should take care of parents no matter if parents have son or doenst have....

    DisAgree [6] Agree [25] Reply Report Abuse

  • Langoolacharya., Belman / Washington, DC.

    Mon, Dec 06 2021

    What type of sons are these ?... How they expect their children treat them when they become old ??... What culture is this???....DISGUSTING... ...Tak...Takk...

    DisAgree [7] Agree [39] Reply Report Abuse


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Title: Mangaluru: Rejected by children, Subbalaxmi's hope hinges on senior citizen's helpline



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