December 30, 2019

“I do not find any meaning in living, and I want to die. Please tell me, what is the purpose of my life? So affirmed, a desperate 12th standard boy who came to me for counselling. I told him to cool down, to sit quiet for a while and then asked him the purpose and meaning of his studies, of his games etc., and finally told him that sometimes we may feel that life and our many activities have no meaning at all. But as human beings we have the capacity to think and reflect, to choose and act cautiously. We have two powers, first to discern meaning in life and second, to give meaning to life. We are intelligent, conscious beings and we are endowed with the creative power to make life meaningful and purposeful.

Of course, I sent him satisfied for the time being and called him for another session. I exhorted him not to grudge at life but to smile at it and enjoy the beauty of living. Nevertheless, the question he raised demands further reflection. There are others, mostly adults and students, who come for counselling with similar questions. But we need to ask why we should feel that our life is purposeless and meaningless. What leads a person to think that way? Why he cannot succeed to get an answer by himself? Why some do not succeed to find meaning and decide to end their lives? What way we can help them? How our students can leave school with a firm conviction that life has a definite purpose which they strive hard to attain? These questions need to be reflected upon at a deeper level.

Life considered from a sheer biological perspective might be just a living organism, like any other species, which is just born and casually dies after some time. A dog, a cat, or for that matter any living being is just born on a day and dies on another day. But human species have evolved and attained a higher level, so much so that it entails a mind, consciousness, intelligence with several potentialities like the sense of freedom which enables every member of the species to think, to choose among several options, to arrive at a decision and to pursue a course of action with definite goal and purpose. All this vouches for the fact that life in itself has a purpose and a person must learn to discern or ‘intuit’ this purpose.

This does not mean that we do not face roadblocks and life will always be smooth sailing from beginning to end. For some, especially those who have strong determination and will power, it can be quite smooth, but for others it could be a strenuous struggle and a challenge to experience meaning and purpose in life. The so called negative experiences of our own past, the complexities of the present and the unknown future, have potentialities to offer roadblocks and bring anyone, face to face with the absurd and the futility of existence.

All this happens simply because the human consciousness, though unique, has its own limitations. The human eye for example can see things within certain limits. The naked eye cannot see the distant stars in the sky and the tiny life cells in a drop of blood. We need the additional help of a telescope or a microscope, to perceive things at higher and lower levels. Similarly the human consciousness has higher and lower levels which it cannot reach without additional help and extra efforts. An ordinary example is sudden inspirations, insights we experience in our life. The scientific term for this is ‘intuition’. We reflect with a problem for a long time and suddenly we ‘intuit’ the solution. Scientists deliberate days together a particular question and suddenly ‘intuit’ the answer which can lead them to new scientific discoveries and inventions. Constant reflection is the ‘additional help’ we provide to our ordinary consciousness so that it perceives reality at a deeper or at a higher level. Meditation and concentration exercises similar to yoga too can open up new vistas of higher or deeper consciousness.

Now coming back to our enquiry, whether life has purpose and meaning at all, what we can say is that life should be considered first of all holistically, as having physical, mental, social, psychological and spiritual dimensions. Overburdening of consciousness through stress, strain, worries or existential conflicts and crisis can lead the mind to a blind alley, to a dead end with no light to go ahead or to a total darkness enveloping the mind. What we need to do is to provide ‘additional help’ to reach deeper and higher levels of consciousness.

The example of the student who came for counselling is to be imitated by all people who face this sort of problems. One can also just enter into silent reflection and meditation waiting upon new ‘intuition’ to enlighten the mind. By entering into a prayer hall, temple, church and spending time in meditation, awaiting divine help to enlighten our mind through new inspiration, new insight or intuition into the complex realities of life, we can certainly come out of blind alleys and dark zones. Note the difference between two persons who are in deep crisis - one puts an end to his life in order to liberate himself from the crisis, and the other enters into a temple to pray in silence in order to get enlightenment. The difference is in the means they choose to resolve the crisis. The former surrenders to cowardice and depression while the latter strengthens himself to proceed ahead in life.

The question then arises, what leads one to make a right choice? Here, we can definitely affirm the role of parents, elders and teachers. Human species has evolved through the ages and reached the present condition, all the way making right choices for survival. The contemporary human society which is an evolutionary product of millions of preceding years, is replete with definite values, norms and beliefs. All these are pre-given to a new born child. It means it is not born in a vacuum. It is born within the context of a family, which looks after the child not only physically but also psychologically, morally and spiritually. The family, school and religion are the institutions which accompany a child from infancy to see that it assimilates right values and develops proper behaviour. These institutions basically teach a child to make right use of freedom through right choices. From this, we can infer that the parents, teachers, family members and religious instructors are the primary agents of transmission of positive values, norms and beliefs of life from generation to generation. Concretely, it means that if a child grows without any purpose in life, the parents, teachers and religious instructors are to be blamed to a great extent. Shall we conclude then that the supreme obligation of all religions, educational institutions and families is to teach children not only to discern the meaning and purpose of life but also to instruct them to give meaning and purpose to life when they face emptiness and absurdity? If this is done, our children will certainly pass through our educational institutions with immense belief and confidence in themselves and in the divine.