Autobiography of a Married Bachelor in the Gulf

Jan 14, 2011

 
I was thrilled as I boarded the aeroplane which would carry me to Oman. This was my first journey by air and I had to come to terms with it as yet. As I entered the plane, I was glad to know that I had got a window seat.
 
Soon a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach informed me that the plane was airborne. Excitedly I looked out of the window. To my surprise and delight I could see us leaving behind the ground of my motherland at Santa Cruz Airport. I was a little scared at leaving the security of the earth behind me but all around me I saw people quite unconcerned at this phenomenon, so I tried to relax too.
 
No sooner did I take my window seat and the plane was heading leisurely than I started to reflect upon how I left my hometown, how excited I was to get into the Mumbai-bound bus and had almost forgotten to bid goodbye to my wife Wilma and sons Ronny and Johnny, aged 5 and 3.
 
I reflected upon my promise to Wilma of my return after three years to start a business. I even started to question the wisdom of relinquishing my four-year-old government job at the Civil Court in Mangalore,
 
As I was reflecting upon this, I soon got a breathtaking view on either side of me - we had entered into the airspace of Oman. On my left I could see the blue Arabian Sea and on the right the never ending cliffs of bare brown mountains and in between stretched the black ribbon runway of Seeb Airport.
 
The plane touched Seeb at 4 pm and I stepped out on the evening of January 19, 1983. A gentle cool breeze arrested my attention from an unpleasant loud screech and after the immigration formalities I was out to be collected by a local and driven straight to the office of my employer. I greeted him while he was well ensconced in a sprawling office overlooking the Arabian sea.
 
The big white man hurled at me the first question, “How was your flight?” I replied, “It was nice Sir,” while I was quite surprised to notice that he was busy giving orders to the driver to take me straight to my living cabin without even caring to listen to what I had to answer!
 
There were only Indians in the camp, in all nine, working for the British Company I had just joined. Some were working in the accounts, and Jerry Lobo was the chief accountant but he was not happy to live as a married bachelor, in fact I later realized neither did any of them. Only Keralites and Mangaloreans were among the Indians.
 
My first week went on well but as I drifted into the second, I became terribly homesick, I missed my wife, and children.
 
I liked my job as I was attached with the Chief in the office and all the office staff was quite friendly and even the locals were in a pleasant mood and soon six months were over and it was time for me to visit my homeland.
 
I got many letters from my family members to bring presents. I bought my first wrist watch, then a music system, bit of gold and plenty of presents for family and relatives.
 
On arrival at my hometown, many invitations started pouring in to dinner or lunch and by the time I was ready to return I was hardly left with any money.
 
On my return, I came to know that one Terry Desa, a fresh recruit, had arrived at the camp. He had come with a determination to get to New Zealand at the first opportunity and settle there. Oman was just a stepping stone for his future plan.
 
Terry and I became thick friends as we both were relatively new and were about the same age - 31 years.
 
On rare occasions there was this uneasy calm in the canteen, particularly during the late hours of the day and once Terry and I had to intervene to restore peace.
 
Days rolled on, and I had made my second visit and on return I realized that one Richard Pereira had joined us and his ‘mantra’ was to work only for five years and go back.
 
He was a clever fellow, this Richie, he would not buy anything in Oman except soap and toothpaste, and used Indian stamps for letters. He went on buying land wherever he got it cheap in Mangalore. One day I heard that he even bought land close to my house at Chimbi Gudda in 1985 at just Rs 5000 per cent!
 
He had occupied the cabin next to that of mine and would talk to me anything and everything but would not even so much as mention about that land purchase almost next to mine – isn’t that clever??
 
I went on making regular visits home and every time I visited, I determined that the next trip would be my last and I would soon settle and start a business. But the good salary, food and above all the Scotch would keep me from hometown.
 
Among the Keralites, both Ravindran and Gopinathan were very enterprising. Gopinathan was still young; he soon got married and went back to his old company – Indian Oils – as he did not want to live the life of a married bachelor. Ravindran was quite mature and had already sent his son to the USA for studies and was planning to settle there after his son’s studies.
 
Very soon five years passed by and one fine morning Richie announced his resignation, and went back to Mangalore on completion of five years.
 
Terry being a good friend of mine, kept me well informed of the progress of his effort to settle in New Zealand, and as luck would have it just on the heels of Richie’s departure, Terry too got his visa to New Zealand and left Oman and took his family and settled there.
 
This was the period when localization was at its peak and every time one of us left, the locals were by now decently trained to replace us.
 
As was expected, soon after I returned from my next trip home, Jerry Lobo announced that he too got a job in Qatar with a furnished family accommodation and better salary, and he left for Qatar. He brought his wife and children there. His wife, a teacher, started to supplement the family income by giving tuitions and Jerry being a good family man went on giving good education to his children and the last I heard of him was when he wrote to me to say that his sons had finished studying in the States and would settle there.
 
But I continued to work and make regular visits home without much caring as to what my sons were doing at school. My wife Wilma was a good housewife no doubt but too liberal with the children and as the money started coming, my sons Ronny and Jhonny just grew up with no proper direction, and became school dropouts. .
 
Each time I returned to Oman, I started carrying several passport details of my friends and relatives and virtually all of them remained untouched.
 
As the years rolled on I found myself involuntarily getting hooked to drinks which initially I used as a means to circumvent my homesickness but later became a slave to it.
 
My promise of returning home in three years had wilted long since and now it is almost 27 years since I have been at my job. I was PA to the top boss and none could replace me. So, as the years rolled on, and I started to turn older; the rich food, the drink, and lack of exercise have all conspired to debilitate me to the point when I found that even getting to the first floor was an ordeal.
 
Men had come and men had gone but I remained at my job disregarding all the consequences.
 
I was now 58 and one fine morning I found a letter from the company on my desk and it read “While we thank you for your long service, we regret to inform you that your services are no longer needed from the first of next month…” 
 
I remained silent for a while and then reflected upon all my erstwhile colleagues: Richard Pereira, who had gone on buying land, now after twenty years, is sitting pretty on a gold mine as the price of land in Mangalore has gone through the roof. Then Terry Desa and Jerry Lobo both of whom very wisely used their stay in Oman to fine-tune their future.
 
Ravindran writes to me to say how happy he is now in the USA and he has still a few years to retire there and Gopalan is still working for The Indian Oils.
 
After the termination, I went to the accounts department, and the Omani officer settled all my dues and I returned home after serving 27 years in the Gulf.
 
Much of my money now goes to pay my medical bills, my sons have got married but they are earning a small salary and naturally I have to be a good father to them for I was never there to guide them, and my wife is no longer young and is neither happy to see the state of our sons nor to see my poor health, and the dwindling bank balance.
 
Majority of my colleagues at the Civil Court have happily retired and the first week of every month they see the ATMs coughing up a good sum of pension at them, and they are as healthy as ever and now I feel that if only I had continued to work at the Civil Court and continued to mind my family and farm, I would have been much better off than what I am now.
 
As for friends, relatives and invitations to lunch and dinners, it is history now.
 

Jimmy Noronha - Archives:

By Jimmy Noronha
Jimmy Noronha, originally from Belloor, Bantwal, has extensively travelled abroad and is now settled at Lucknow, Uttar Pradesh. In this article he is trying to explain the life of a married bachelor in the Gulf.
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Comment on this article

  • Albert & Kitty Gonsalves, Bendore / U.A.E.

    Sun, Jan 30 2011

    Well written article, its an eye opener for most expats living in the Gulf and do not save for a rainy day.

  • Deepak Kumar, Mangalore / Indian

    Sat, Jan 22 2011

    A Very true article and an eye opener to all who think there is Gold in the Gulf.. India is the best if not for the corruption and the communial hatred!!!!!!!!!

  • naveen kulshekar, mulund mumbai

    Thu, Jan 20 2011

    an exellent artile to read .It is true, our people who go for hunting rich field to earn lots funds, they get the oppurtunity but sad to say that same people forget the past and fail to protect their future becone bankrupt when they retire from the job.When they return to their native scenario is different. their very own people say wife ,childre and others keep away from him because he is noearning more. we all know how our people behave when you dont have a penny with you!

  • Audrey, mumbai/india

    Thu, Jan 20 2011

    very good article.A good lesson to learn to take our steps carefully and also not only to slog but to save our hard earned money.It also teaches us how imp our family life.time ones lost never returns..so think carefully

  • Leslie Fernandes, Bombay

    Thu, Jan 20 2011

    I Fully Agree With You Priya. I Pray My Family would Understand This atleast once.

  • Alwyn , Dubai,Mangalore

    Wed, Jan 19 2011

    The real problem is not speaking out to Family about reality .People working in Gulf spend and show the family that they are doing very well and to maintain that they spend everything without saving .When the reality comes out its too late .

  • Felix F., India/Ksa

    Wed, Jan 19 2011

    JIMMY NORONHA, BELLORE/LUCKNOW,

    Thank you for your humility, in offering clarification and apology. That to me is the greatness of a person.

    If there was a small note at the end of the article saying, the names mentioned in the article, are not necessarily that of the writer or his relations. It would have prevented the mis understanding, specially in the minds of those like me, reading your articles for the first time.

    Thank you again, and looking forward for more of your articles.

  • Chris, Kuwait

    Wed, Jan 19 2011

    Great autobiography.....an eye opener, beyond doubt.

  • Ahmed, MAngalore / Doha

    Wed, Jan 19 2011

    Beautiful. Even though we all try to be like riche, we cannot.

  • JIMMY NORONHA, BELLORE/LUCKNOW

    Wed, Jan 19 2011

    Felix F.

    It is unfair on my part if I do not clear the confusion still lurking about.

    Lancy Noronha met me only once in Bellore when I fleetingly visited there in 1987, he was very young then. He knows little about my personal life, he has heard of me and loves me but he has no knowledge of my personal life as is the case with most of my family members since I am in Lucknow for a very long time and rarely visit Bellore.

    Bellore is our root where our family has seen the joy and the sorrow and hence we are pulled towards one another, never mind the personal life. He wrote with affection but I will always overlook all those errors which are irrelevant.

    My apologies to you for any confusion.

  • Vishal, Mangalore/Muscat

    Tue, Jan 18 2011

    I fully agree to what Clara Lewis has written. The house maids are really sacrificing their life for their family members!!! Lord Jesus I bessech you, please give them the strength to live.

  • reni, udupi/mumbai

    Tue, Jan 18 2011

    Autobiography of a Married Bachelor in the Gulf ia
    a beautiful true touching Article written by Sir Jimmy Noronha. This is the case with our thousands of gulf returned married bachelors.
    Sir Jimmy's Article teaches a best lesson to the married bachelors in the gulf and gulf bachelors who are going to get married as well. They should be aware of their well planned future life and how to utilize their hard earned good money and hence welcoming rewardable future. I understand that in the Article written by Sir Jimmy, it is the biography of the Married Bachelor in the Gulf and not the biography of the Writer and nothing to do with his earlier Articles.

  • Felix F.,, India/Ksa

    Tue, Jan 18 2011

    JIMMY NORONHA

    There is a big differnce in the way of acceptance in the minds of the readers when they read about a self experience story, and or the story of a created human.

    Majority of the comments, inlcuding mine, appear to be based on the assumption that the story was based on your personal experience.

    Personnally I feel foolish about the seriousness of my comments, considering, I being fooled by the author, though it is not your mistake, but my poor judgement.

    I wonder how the following comments could be wrong, considering they call you Uncle and from your own native place.

    Lancy Noronha, Bellore -Dubai

    Dear Jimmy Uncle, nice article. Thanks for your true expireicnes sharing with all brothers/sisters.
    I will find your small/youngest brother/top konkani singer/my sweet bappu -KONKAN M. RAFI IVAN NORONHA's face in you. I'am proudly appreceating your natural life experiences sharing with us. expecting more, more -
    always you are in our prayers..
    lancy, Shyna, Lanita & baby Lanisha

    Based on the above, which says your true experience and your denial, I hereby withdraw my comments knowing the truth of the article. Thank you

  • JIMMY NORONHA, BELLORE/LUCKNOW

    Mon, Jan 17 2011

    Deepak, Mangalore, Dubai

    While I thank you for your comment, please allow me to let you know that the present article is not my story at all. It is just an autobiography of a married bachelor in the gulf.
    Whereas the article “Is there life after Gulf” is my own story and also my sons studied at the place mentioned by you and now they continue to work there.

  • Vishal, Mangalore/Muscat

    Mon, Jan 17 2011

    Very good article. The author is successful in touching the hearts of the readers.

    A thought to share: The hero is still lucky to have a good job and good salary and a chance to go visit family once in 2 years. Truly is lucky. There are poor people in the Gulf who have no god job, salary nor a chance to visit the family once in 2 years even. There are people who are able to go on leave once in 4 years. What will be the extent of the pain of such people and their famlies??????

  • Clara Lewis, Kemmannu/Dubai

    Mon, Jan 17 2011

    The life of Married Bachelors is far better than the life of married spinsters working as housemaids in the Gulf, some of them never get any holidays and never get to go anywhere or meet anyone. Whole of their life they spend inside the four walls bearing everything for their family and children back home, just to provide them decent life and education.

  • Raymond , Kundapur/Kuwait

    Mon, Jan 17 2011

    Mr. Jimmy Noronha can you please reply us with comments Deepak, Mangalore ,Dubai.

    I am also in same condition. Where you say landed first time gulf in 1983 where as in article there life after gulf you already here since from 1973?? Very confussing

  • Deepak, Mangalore ,Dubai

    Mon, Jan 17 2011

    Please refer to the Article Is There Life after Gulf? written by the same Author where he mentioned Sons are UK educated and doing well. In this article He says different things about the sons condition

  • Ronald, Mangalore

    Mon, Jan 17 2011

    I agree with Nancy, Belman. Desires are never ending. However we cannot sit quite. We need to plan and use the time and opotunities wisely in order to succeed in life. As mentioned by Nancy settling in USA or newzeland does not mean they suceeded in life. Who knows what is in store for them when they grow older there?. We cannot change the destiny. At the same time we cannot keep quite thiking that we cannot change the destiny. So work hard but use the time and oportunites in a wise manner.

  • Paul, india

    Mon, Jan 17 2011

    good artical ..this gulf true story i started my carrier 98 in kuwait till now my bank ballance is not even 1 lac my sllary almost 70,000 Rs everymonth something or other expances every month every year iam thinking to save . but till now no . yes i don't have any bad habits i have 2 kids and wife. way of iam leving as a BIG man yes iam not show of but once u started leving standard life ... u cannot go back.my home place iambig hero but i know iam just zero .... just closeing bath room door crying.

    yes easy to say u have to plan . when u plan something expances on way
    some one said 'wifes are gulfe widows, yes somehow .. but their husband brother sister they also not happy hear everyone has staying and working coz of some commentments its not true they ar enjoyeing life can say u can work in india wht iam getting sallery hear i'll not get even 5000 rs how i can keep my fly happy .....neverend

  • Anwesha, Dublin/mangalore

    Mon, Jan 17 2011

    Very good article......but the experience is not restricted to the Gulf workers only.....it applies to most of us working abroad. But the Question to ask is WOULD WE HAVE LEFT HOME IF WE HAD A BETTER QUALITY OF LIFE THERE? Our needs have drawn us abroad but as some one said if we have proper planning of how many years we are going to work aborad and how we are gonna spend money then its a worthwhile expereince. I wish I had that planning done!!!

  • Violet, Mangalore/UAE

    Sun, Jan 16 2011

    Very well written article. THank you Mr. Jimmy for the wonderful article. Would like to read another article on the biography of Married Spinster in Mangalore!!

  • Mohammad M.B., Uppinangady, Dubai

    Sun, Jan 16 2011

    Nice article. I had a similar plan of spending 3 years, save money and go back to my country. Now, i have spent almost 2 decades in Dubai and don't know when to go back to Mangalore to settle down!

  • G.N.BANGERA, Mijar/Muscat

    Sun, Jan 16 2011

    This is by luck some get good place earn & live with family some not those who have job in India never dream of gulf , with out best job only search for gulf to make fortune for future many are become rich with care of self giving present is best for getting more from GOD life move peacefuly now there is Manmohan Singh brought cheer to Indian by his policy of open market make good money even labour get 300 RS per day Lunch 2 tea is best live with family the poor are happy with

  • R Mallar, Kasaragod/ Dubai

    Sun, Jan 16 2011

    For the typical gulf returnee depicted by this article, a government initiated pension fund where he contributes a healthy sum every month would have helped a lot. Governments lay red carpet to rich NRIs but totally ignores poor/ middle class NRIS like the hero of this article.

  • zacs18, Mangalore

    Sun, Jan 16 2011

    Thanks for such a wonderful autobiography..Key leaning in this article "ITS ALL TO DO WITH PLANNING" which is the only way to success. Our Plan, determination to achieve, hard work, faith in god will sure help to realize the plan which once seemed IMPOSSIBLE and finally THANKING GOD FOR HIS BLESSING. Another important aspects which is very difficult is “ Work Life Balance” which will help to maintain a good health and prosperous living…Look forward for more such kind inspiring article’s.

  • Shanthi, Thottam/Tennessee

    Sun, Jan 16 2011

    What you've written is a story of many Indian husbands who leave behind their families and sacrifice their lives to build gulf countries. I would love to read about one of those wives perspectives (should I say gulf widow) of how hard it was for her to lead her life, on and off husband for 27 years, while carefully saving hard earned gulf money of her husband and struggling with disciplining kids.

  • sonia, bhopal

    Sun, Jan 16 2011

    A lesson for all to learn,very well written....we all live in our own comfort zones fearing to take any risks,money is not everything in life,family comes first.Thanks Mr. Noronha for this touching tale peace and tranquility and a sense of satisfaction are much much greater than all the treasures of the world!

  • Priya, Mangalore/USA

    Sun, Jan 16 2011

    Good article, only if the moms, sisters and brothers, wife and kids would understand with what difficulty they were getting everything they asked..... most of the people working abroad would not have to face a life which they hate.

  • Alexander P Menezes, Karkala/Dubai

    Sun, Jan 16 2011

    First of all my sincere congratulations to Mr. Jimmy Noronha for writing such a class article for the readers to read which reflect the present realities of most of the Gulfies. Secondly there are awful lots of people in this site, who do not have a capacity to digest these kinds of well written articles and always air their criticism against the writer not knowing that writer is just an instrument, in picturising the story through his pen for us to read. It is not fair to assume that this story is of writer’s story and he himself is the victim of this story.

    I myself have seen several of such victims who had come to Gulf in search of better living conditions, worked and slogged here for several year’s leaving their young wives, children, parents and relatives back home. Most of them really struggled to make a decent life here in Gulf with increasing demands of wives, children and parents to send monies back home. These monies were spent unwisely by the kin’s back home on lavish lifestyles, as these monies were not hard earned monies for them. Most of these Gulfies came home once in two years or once in a year to spend a month or two with their children and wives back home, but did not have time to check on how the children are doing at school, nor kept an eye their medical checkups on a regular basis. They just spent their vacation time in partying/visiting friends, drinking scotch whiskey and feasting each day and night. But when it was time for them to go back, only to

  • Vincy Pinto, Angelore/Dubai

    Sun, Jan 16 2011

    Dear Sir, I do agree with your biography, But it’s happens in past years, any how the bitter truth came out from the article.

  • Molly Munro, Dubai

    Sun, Jan 16 2011

    Very touching article. Many many married bachelors come to gulf with a burning desire to earn & then invest to improve their financial position instead face many trials and tribulations in gulf, land themselves in debt and finally retire with no savings to look after themselves. This is a fact which Mr. Jimmy has narrated it in a more simpler and realistic way. Hats off to you Mr. Jimmy, hope to receive many such genuine articles from you.

  • Lancy, Udupi / KUWAIT

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    Dear Jimmy, Thank you for the good article. its not only for bachelors in abroad also for the couples because they never think to settle in thier home country once they start working in abroad and expect lot from thier children in studies to start earning more n more but most of the cases thier childrens will not do better, therefore, its not right earning & keeping lot of money and property for your children than guiding them to get proper education by staying with them during thier education time so that they can struggle and come up in life.

  • Mark D Souza, Mangalore/Dubai

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    Dear Jimmy Noronha,

    You have been honest with your story. It cautions young men in the gulf who have families back home to strike a good balance.Thank very much. Please write more.
    Nancy Belman - Ladies like you will desire gold and riches and the poor men finish their lives in the gulf satisfying your obsession for gold and riches. It is OK if men reward themselves with a peg of Scotch after all the hard work.

  • lohith, mangalore/dubai

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    good lesson to all the married bachelors to think twice on there gulf life....

  • L N Rego, Bendur

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    Thouhgtful and realistic article. Most people may not agree as we read the comments we
    could feel that but truth is always bitter.
    This very point i mention during many of my seminars to educate the young generation.
    What is the fun in sacrificing life without enjoying it.When
    we retire our children have theire dreams to chase and no relationship with parents,
    No health and none to take care the parents.If money making is the only goal in life, where this will lead us?
    Still people have the strong belief that opportunities are only abroad, Its important to notice the growth of our nation.Even though the system is corrupt its worth living a life than sacrificing and suffering.
    Important to know in life is how to balance life with finance, Family, Society and Charity.
    Once again congrats for the Article

  • Balakrishna T Shetty, Mangalore

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    Very nice heart touching article… tears came in my eyes because I am also in the same boat. Fourteen more years are left here, but there is no any bank balance. God’s graces don’t have any habits of alcohol and smoking.

  • JIMMY NORONHA, BELLORE/LUCKNOW

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    Mr. Felix F. and Mr. Rony Belloor,

    I sincerely respect your constructive criticism as it is the main muscle of the media. “The Autobiography of a Married Bachelor in the Gulf” has nothing to do with my life in the Gulf and it is written with a view to ameliorate the lot of a married bachelor in the Gulf and in view of which I have given three escape routes viz either to shift to the West, find a suitable job elsewhere in the Gulf or return home rather than ruin ones health, as for me health is more important than wealth. There is also a didactic tinge as often the father in the gulf falls short of his duty of keeping an eye on the children.

    With all humility I respect the views of every reader as freedom of speech is our birthright.

  • sandesh dsilva, brhmavar,udupi

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    Dear noronha uncle,i read ur article.i heard this same story with lot of my friends and relatives who works in gulf countries.I appreciate for your true and real lifes story.no one can change the fast.be in present life and enjoy the lifetime with whatever you have......hats of you ...sandesh dsilva kuwait.

  • Umesh Rai, Puttur

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    I AM LITTER BIT CONFUSED OF THE WRITER AS HE WROTE HIS BIOGRAPHY WHERE HE STATED THAT HE RETIRED FROM HIS CIVIL COURT JOB AND LEFT TO MUSCAT. BUT ONE OF HIS ARTICLE - MANGALORE TO BOMBAY SAYS "In no time, I hopped over to Philips India, and then stepped over to Tatas and the rest is history. After changing jobs as I wished for a certain period, I finally got a fine platform at Shell in Muscat." ANY WAY GOOD WRITING.

  • Shamila, Mangalore

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    Very true and a clear fact. Touching article though!

  • seby, Goa

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    Jimmy.N. you know how to bring tears to the persons who reads your article  ,but i guess things have changed and they moved in diffrent directions with the youngsters. good article

  • Vijay, Mangalore, Mangalore

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    Very good article. There are people who is struggling everyday in the Gulf. Its depends on the persons way of living. You have to be very careful with our expenses and income. People are coming to Gulf for the better future of their family members. Its difficult to stay all alone but if you determined about the your future plans nothing is impossible. Being working in the gulf for the past 15 years I do not face any problems. So once again its the person's way of thinking and living.

  • Bhaskar, Udupi/Qatar

    Sat, Jan 15 2011

    Very nice and true article...

  • melwyn, mangalore

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    gulfies typical story, spcly mangis.

  • Lancy Noronha, Bellore -Dubai

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Dear Jimmy Uncle, nice article. Thanks for your true expireicnes sharing with all brothers/sisters.
    I will find your small/youngest brother/top konkani singer/my sweet bappu -KONKAN M. RAFI IVAN NORONHA's face in you. I'am proudly appreceating your natural life experiences sharing with us. expecting more, more -
    always you are in our prayers..
    lancy, Shyna, Lanita & baby Lanisha

  • Louie D'Cunha, Kulshekar/Canada

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Nice story Jemmy. This is not one person's biography but of thousands. Indians specially Mangaloreans went to Gulf in 80s and 90s were much better than those who went there in 40s & 50s. Many of them were domestic servants or low salaried. Even the exchange rate was much lower than today. Domestic servants have suffered a lot because they used to get vacation once in 2 years and all that they earned was sent home to maintain their families. When they returned for good after long service their state of affairs was pathetic because they did not have fringe benefits from their employers. Worst thing is they do not get the same respect which they used get when they were in the Gulf even from their own family members. Many have short lived after returning from long service in the Gulf. Working in the Gulf as a married bachelor is HELL for him as well as for his wife in India

  • Valerian Futado, Mukli/Canada

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Is this an article or an autobiography?

    Wow…Nice honest biography…very few people would acknowledge, and I loved the writer…and wanted to read more of his article as I could relate myself to it at some level. This was however my first opinion.

    Then I clicked on the link on his earlier article that was written in Daijiiwould, “Is there life after Gulf?.”

    The two things (biographies) are completely contradictory, If the author is writing an article he should not put it as a biography…biography is a biography.. an article can be anything.

  • Rony, kuriyalla vado,bellore

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Dear Mr Noronha,
    I am also from Bellore. You have raised an Interesting issue and have applied salt to our woundes as I to am one among the married bachelors in Bahrain,

    Take care

  • Denzil, Mangalore/Chennai

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    True reflection of a professional leaving everything to earn his daily bread...

  • abdul rahiman kavoor, kavoor/sharjah

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Really an eye opener to one and all.

  • Francis, Mangalore / Kuwait

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    An article like this is an eye opener.

  • Ashraf, Adkar

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Good.

  • Ronald, Mangalore

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Very good artice. It clearly shows that just working hard and earning money is not enough. Children easlily get spoiled if they are not given good direction by the parents. That too when they get enough money to spend they are likely to fail in school as they lose interest in studies. It is very important to build our children's carrier. People like Jerry and Ravindran did a fantastic job. Thanks for sharing the experience which deffinetly helps others.

  • Fr Steve, Bejai

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Good article....

  • A.S.Mathew, U.S.A.

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    I am delighted to read another article
    from your pen. It is a very
    precise and the true story of many
    people working in many parts of
    the world, especially in the gulf
    countries.

    It points out very clearly that
    those people who had definite
    goals in life could divert their
    flight path in that direction some way or other. We all can plan and
    dream, but the course of destiny
    is in the hand of God.

  • Nancy, Belman

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    We realise afterwards and keep on thinking/saying "if I did that, If I had gone there? etc etc". It is destiny.

    Life is in our hand, If you have not drunk too much and keep on enquired about your sons, there was no need of repenting today. Thats all.

    Even people who are settled in USA or Newzeland will think that "If I had done this, today I would have gone to moon or puchased a piece of land in Moon etc etc."

    So man's desire is never ending. So be happy whatever you have and lead a peaceful life till you are on this earth.

  • Felcy, Mangalore/Dubai

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    How very true, painful and real. Life has flown past for many - life so meaningless, dreamless and lonesome. A question to ask oneself - have you really lived a life or are you living a life? Unfortunately, the truth is life has to go on - you have to carry on breathing like the saying goes - The woods are lovely, dark and deep but I have promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep.

  • Kiran Vasant, Dubai

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    In the most simple manner possible, the author has brought out the normal life style of all 'married bachelors' in the gulf. Don't hang on...move on, people!Well written Mr. Jimmy Noronha....

  • Mohan, Mangaluru

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Splendid,but true to the core. Very few lucky, those who plan their expenditure/investment and care about health,are the winners. Others just loose in wrong run.

  • Felix F.,, India/Ksa

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Jimmy Noronha
    If you could take some time out, and say to yourself, I will not compare myself with anybody else.

    This is what God has given me,and planned for me, and I will accept God`s WILL, now and in the future happily.

    If you can do this, you and your family will live happily ever after. (I have 35 years similar gulf experience as yours, so can advise you the best)

  • sandeep, doha qatar

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Very nice article....it's really a heart touching biography..wishing mr jimmy a good health.

  • Nadeem, karkala/UAE

    Fri, Jan 14 2011

    Beautiful narration...An eye opener for a carefree attitude....


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Title: Autobiography of a Married Bachelor in the Gulf



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