With a Pinch of Salt: When I Went to Exercise my Franchise...

  •   Sat, Apr 27 2024
  •   By Hemacharya

April 27, 2024

Don't get confused, in simple Indian English the above statement only means that I went to the polling booth, which I have been visiting since 2019 to exercise my vote. There were many surprises awaiting me. First and foremost, the girls seated in a party booth 100 meters away from the polling station struggled to find my name in their long list. Finally, someone came saying - "Sir. You're no more living. You have died a few years ago." The other girls wanted to run away, assuming that I am a living ghost. But I caught hold of the first girl and asked her - "Could you please find out which year I died?"

She went through a few pages and finally said - "Sir, it's in the year 2017 you have passed away at the age of 26 years.'

"That was my son," - I told her and requested to find my name somewhere. 'I have my voting card, Aadhaar card, ration card if you insist........" - I told her.

By then a big crowd appeared and she asked me to check in another counter. I went to that counter.

But to my great surprise the lady at the other counter was caught up in a bigger puzzle. She had an elderly lady with a fallen face standing with her. When I explained to her my dilemma, she, pointing towards that lady, said, "You may have to either wait or go to the other party's counter to get your problem solved. This poor lady's problem looks bigger and more critical than yours, you know. Someone at 7.15 a.m. has already used her name and exercised her vote. She is now crying and thinks that it could be some of her nasty granddaughters who has done it. She has provided us a list of her 37 grandchildren and we are trying to contact all of them to find out who has played this prank on her."

As per her advice, I went to the other party's counter. Looking at my credentials and after checking the list she said - "Sir, how come you're here? You're supposed to have been dead. Go home and relax. Be happy that you're living your eternal life - NO sickness, NO medicines, NO injections or NO Chemotherapy. I already sent many people like you who are living, but as per voter list they are dead."

By then I saw a old man coming out of the polling both, flaunting his finger and saying, "I am so happy my son is not dead. HE IS ALIVE. His name is still there in the voter list and I voted in his name whereas my name doesn't exist."

 

(My regular readers may think it's a satire, but my request with the concerned - PLEASE LINK THE VOTER LIST TO THE DEATH CERTIFICATES so that no DEAD person comes out and votes for the living voters. My daughter’s name had disappeared from the list and she voted in the name her mother who had died four years ago, a fact which we realised later.)

 

 
By Hemacharya
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Comment on this article

  • Malinga, Mangaluru

    Fri, May 03 2024

    Its refreshing reading both your articles and pun filled comments Langoolji!

  • HENRY MISQUITH, India

    Tue, Apr 30 2024

    "The world is moving forward, and we are lagging behind. The country is in the hands of illiterate & fake degree holders. Oh God, save us from such people.”

  • Jasmine, Mangalore

    Mon, Apr 29 2024

    Nice article. I love to read your articles, however, this time I don’t know if I should laugh or cry. Keep writing and enlightening us on what’s happening around.

  • Rita, Germany

    Mon, Apr 29 2024

    I felt like laugh or cry.It is our India .Never improved with all present or past computer ,digital management.Might take many more decades .Sad :

  • Stany Jovin Menezes, Muscat / Pangla

    Sat, Apr 27 2024

    The polling booth turned into a bit of a laugh and a tear, with scratching their heads at the crazy mix-up.


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