Mar 22, 2009
There was great rejoicing in a household within the college campus of St Aloysius College , Mangalore. A healthy male child was born. Great was the joy of the parents, grandparents and neighbors. That was 52 years ago. 22 March 1957 to be precise.
After the birth of their daughter a year earlier, the arrival of the son came in as a bundle of pride to the parents , the late Joseph Frank and the late Dorothy Rasquinha . They knew instantly that he was special. Hence they decided to name him Jayant ( the victorious)
Like any other normal baby, Jayant grew up with the love of his parents and his grandparents who lived with them in the staff quarters of St Aloysius college. The stages of a healthy growth were obvious. The rolling, the crawling, the first steps and the first words.
It was a cool morning of 17 th January 1959. Jayant was hardly two years old. He complained to his mother of someone hitting him on his head. The child cried bitterly and was restless. Later in the evening, he developed fever. The grandparents dismissed it as a normal bout of flu. But the stubborn fever refused to leave him. He refused to eat and could barely walk. The concerned parents took the two year child to the family physician who told them to immediately refer him to Fr Muller’s Hospital, the only known hospital of those days. A series of tests were performed.
The following day, the parents were told of the results. It was as if the whole world came crumbling down on them. Their dreams were shattered. Two year old Jayant was the victim of the much dreaded polio attack.
At first it was a stage of disbelief to the parents. How could it have happened to a child who had clean surroundings and a healthy upbringing ? But when the bitter fact began to slowly sink in, they decided to do everything possible to save Jayant from that terrible disease. The best of the doctors in Bombay were referred to. Everything that was known to the medical world half a century ago, was tried on Jayant. Nothing could save the child from polio.
It was now evident that Jayant would have a permanent disability on his left leg, waist downwards. It was clearly visible that Jayant’s left leg was much shorter and thinner than his healthy right leg. There was no strength in the affected leg at all. But the child adapted to walking with a heavy limp , using his polio affected leg more as a stilt for balance than a support. Hoping against hope, the parents continued to try country medicines and oil massages on the child as he began to grow , with the hope that the damage could be contained or reversed. But the ferocious after- effects of the polio attack remained and remained well. The dream of the parents that he was special came true – special with a difference.
Jayant grew up in an interesting but healthy atmosphere. His father , a lawyer by profession, was also teaching at St Aloysius College. Hence he had taken up residence at the staff quarters of the college where Jayant was born and grew up. His friends and neighbors were other staff members and their children. The school was a stone’s throw away and the Jesuit Father’s residence was like a second home.
More care was given to the disabled child from all quarters, be it at home, in school or outside. The first look on the child was that of pity and concern. Jayant grew up with his permanent limp. Like other children he could not wear footwear. Be it sun, wind or rain , Jayant went about barefoot.. An accepted brutal reality of those days for a handicapped child.
It was not until he was about eight years old that his parents, friends and teachers realized that Jayant was not after all that totally a helpless child who needed attention. He showed signs of responsibility even at an early age. He was sharp, intelligent and above all, healthy. By the time he turned 10, he had 7 other siblings around him..
With a large family, Jayant’s parents began to entrust him with greater responsibility to take care of the chores of the house. From his early teens, he was looked up to at sorting out problems, from fixing a tube light, changing a fuse wire , or controlling his younger brothers who could be difficult at times.
Jayant’s challenges surfaced at school. Thankfully although he could not participate in running sports, his schoolmates and teachers did not consider him as an invalid. He was a football goal keeper . He was the first in push ups and pull ups, beating all his friends lock, stock and barrel. That was what Jayant was made of. His physical handicap did not dampen his spirit. He longed to be independent and refused sympathy and pity. .
But at home , Jayant was looked up as a very responsible elder son and brother who could be relied on all major home responsibilities. Jayant did not demand any preferential treatment. He ate with the rest, shared the same children’s room, played with the siblings as if he was a normal boy.
Sadly the outside world saw Jayant as a burden as he could not be a normal person . But Jayant grew up with respect. He was a common point for all his college friends. He adapted to wearing specially stitched trousers to fit his uneven height. He now started wearing shoes and adapted to it almost instantly. He showed great leadership qualities In college and was also the class representative .
Yet, there were curious minds in the neighborhood wondering how Jayant could face the fierce world independently. Everybody thought for sure that Jayant would not leave the safe confines of his home. But many did not know the grit and determination that Jayant possessed. Soon after his BCom graduation and a diploma in Business Management , Jayant looked out for a decent job like any other young man.
“ I made my passport” recalls Jayant, “ and was planning to go abroad and begin my life.” “My father approached his close friend who was working in the Gulf to try and look out for an opening for me. But when the reply came, my heart sank and I wept when I read the letter.” says Jayant. The letter was very painful, de-motivating, disheartening and almost a condemnation. “ It stated that I would not survive the harsh realities of the outside world and hence it would be best that I remain in the safe haven of my home. That hurt me and I was all the more determined now to stand up on my own feet, come what may.” relates Jayant.
He got a good position in Indian Airlines Corporation through the handicap quota. Surprisingly, Jayant refused the offer saying that he could come up in life and survive without the handicap stigma attached to him. Instead, he decided to leave home, go to far off Bombay and fend for himself. A bold decision for a handicapped person.
He decided to join his maternal uncle’s firm , based in Bombay. He quickly learnt the trade and with the help and support of his uncle and his colleagues, Jayant stamped his presence permanently in the same company.
The initial bachelor days at Bombay was fun for Jayant, just like any other youngster. He was a popular figure at the KCA ( Kanara Catholic Association) hostel in Bandra where he resided during his first three years outside of home. Everybody recalls his remarkable ability to play cricket. He had tremendous skill in spin bowling. He bowled without a run up but was very effective in winning matches. His batting ability was not to be underestimated. It was exciting to see him hit stretch shots and was assisted by a runner as he could not run. All this from a lame young man.
But the sympathy wave still loomed over him. One day Jayant was very tired and was walking back to the hostel. A senior citizen approached him and said, “ Son, I can imagine how difficult it is for you to walk.” For which Jayant promptly replied saying, “sir, what you see is just my external limp. But what I am within , you will never know. I am quite capable of many things you cannot imagine.” The man apologized to Jayant for considering him otherwise.
In Bombay, he used a scooter attached to a side car and zipped through the dangerous roads. Then came the time for Jayant , like any other aspiring young man to decide on settling down. Again, it was as if the whole world were glaring at Jayant. A polio affected handicapped man looking for an alliance ?
But as the saying goes, “ marriages are made in heaven”, Jayant met his true life partner Suzie . She saw beyond the physical appearance of Jayant and decided to take Jayant as her truly beloved husband . From that day onwards, there were no regrets. Jayant and Suzie are blessed with a daughter Karen. They have made Mumbai their home. Nothing for them is abnormal. Jayant, as usual is the backbone of his family, doing all the outside chores. He drives his own car and is never dependent on anyone else.
Given his good and friendly nature, Jayant’s life is surrounded by friends . His charming, friendly and witty attitude has made him a likable person wherever he goes. Jayant has never taken advantage of his handicap .He does not use a handicap sticker on his car, he does not claim any handicap compensation or privileges from various government schemes. “ Those are for the real handicapped” he says, “ and I am not one”
Jayant is a numismatist. He has a fabulous collection of old coins from all over the world, that he had collected since his college days.
On the lighter side, Jayant has got away from the law because of his handicap. He was once caught by a traffic cop on a “ No Entry” violation. In spite of his repeated pleas, a ticket was promptly written. Jayant got out of the car and limped his way towards the police jeep. The inspector was shocked to learn that he had just booked a handicapped man. He tore the ticket and sent Jayant away with a mild warning.
On another occasion Jayant found it impossible to get parking at the Santa Cruz airport where he had gone to pick up his 76 year old aunt. He had no choice but to park his car in a VIP enclave. When he returned he saw 2 police inspectors and a tow truck waiting for him. Again, the scene was shocking for them . Jayant , the handicapped driver was pushing his old aunt’s wheelchair. Instead of a ticket, the inspectors rushed towards them and assisted with his aunt comfortably seated in the car and a salute to Jayant as he drove away.
“ I never consider myself an invalid” says a confident Jayant. “ I do not want people to treat me as a helpless person”. “ This is the attitude that every physically handicapped person must adopt. Also, it is time for the so called “Normal” people not to brand us as useless and show pity on us”. He expects others to help them live a normal like. Jayant is a living example of a successful life story at is far from over.
Today, the 22 of March 2009, Jayanth celebrates his 52nd birthday. I salute you my brother , my friend, my confidant – HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU !